Let’s look at fear and how easy it is to be fearless, even though there is the space of judgment potential to open.
Fear is an emotional response: something happens we get afraid, our body locks up, we freeze, we go into flight mode or decide to fight.
The reason that we have it, is because of a part of our brain, the hind brain, the first part of the brain that developed in humanity, is programmed to look for fear, doubt, danger, uncertainty, suspicion, boredom and complication when viewing our world around us.
If anything that’s happening has any of that, the hind brain will go into a “no” block response.
Let’s look deeper.
What could be happening in this part of the brain, when you’re sitting there and you’re struggling to post something on socials for your business or you’re having doubt come up? This could be a brain response, not because what you have to share isn’t valid or true to you, but because the hind brain doesn’t feel safe or certain or excited by what you’re doing/sharing.
This is where fear shows up to hold us back. Our brain is protecting us form what it now perceives to potentially be dangerous.
What we’re existing in right now is our comfort zone. It’s our known space and our brain can look around and go, we’re alive, we’re safe, so this is how our brain is working and it likes to keep us in the known space.
But if this consistently happens and happens and happens, we then start forming a belief that isn’t necessarily based in fact.
Our work is bad, it’s scary to share things, we might get judged and it’s easier to hold back and play small.
It’s not based in truth because if, for example, that post is published,( even though it had all of these untrue emotions in the brain telling you not too) chances are the worse that will happen is no one comments on it. The best that could happen is appositive response.
But you won’t know if you don’t…..
And when you do, I hope you realize you did a really amazing massive thing.
You’ve actually moved past the reptilian response in your brain.
Whether is a post, a blog, ANY action to move you forward that makes you feel uncomfortable, what you can also ask yourself is “Is this fear real or something I am making up t keep me small and safe?”
The hind brain is a primal part of the brain, so when we want to have a look at a belief and fear, we want to start exploring what beliefs have been created by fear or doubt or the worry about danger or there being uncertainty suspicion potential for boredom or the chance of complication, which is how this part of the brain works.
What beliefs have been programmed in, that are not true?
Whenever you go to post, to phone someone about your products or have a conversation that feels awkward, ask yourself “have I got a belief programmed in, that isn’t necessarily true, that is stopping my action now?”
Be aware that the longer that you let this part of your brain dictate to you what you can and can’t do, the more programmed in a belief will be.
Start asking yourself questions like:
- If in this moment, if I wasn’t afraid, what could I do, if in this moment,?
- If felt confident with the outcome that could potentially happen differently to what I am imagining?
- What would change how by doing this?
- Am i actually protecting myself from danger by not doing this?
Asking these questions, we’re addressing all of the parts of the hindbrain that respond in a way to stop you and we’re switching it over to knew action. We’re telling our brain that it’s safe so we can start creating a new belief
- how can i trust that this is a right thing for me to do right now? There’s boredom,
- how can i be excited about this action, complication
- in doing this, how am i simplifying my life?
I’m constantly asking myself these questions to keep my momentum moving forward
Of course, there’s coaching processes that you can do, there’s belief change processes, but understanding if you are constantly allowing yourself to stay in a space of a certain fear-based emotional response, you are programming, over time, a negative belief, which then makes it even harder to really progress forward.
Here’s an exampling in my own life where fear could have stopped me and I would have missed a fabulous opportunity.
In 2019 I saw a guy in a nightclub. I stood there having a conversation in my head, going, you should give him your phone number.
I’d already had enough trouble with the x, there was suspicion around it, there was uncertainty, it was dangerous, there was so much doubt and fear wrapped around meeting someone new and it just felt super complicated.
So I stood there, at the bar, in a nightclub, with my phone number on a piece of paper, talking myself through this process.
There was nothing to lose, everything to gain, so I gave him the number and it was then up to him, if he decided to call.
Here’s a sample of the self-talk in my head at that time. “why am I suspicious of this person? If I’m so connected and feeling so attracted to this person, and so drawn to this person, why am I doubting my own intuition? It certainly wouldn’t be boring meeting a new person, and it’s only complicated if i let it be….”
I walked downstairs, gave him my phone number, and here we are, living together and happy.
Understanding and overcoming fear, isn’t only about business, this is personal too.
This is how you relate to people, this is how you show up, and by giving yourself this opportunity to reprogram the beliefs you have around things that currently might make you feel fear and afraid. By understanding it’s a programmed response of your brain.
That your brain loves you and it just wants you to be safe but it thinks you being safe is staying in the box.
Understanding how your brain and your programming works, and how you can change beliefs, that’s the first step for being able to dream fearlessly and then take action on those dreams.