Anyone else get a little on edge around this time of year?
It’s ok, you are not alone and after the 2020 we’ve experienced I can image the pressure is on in new and interesting ways.
To be able to serve here are some tips for you to prepare for the day and then not only strive but to also ENJOY the day.
In the lead up to Xmas get clear on what you perceive the expectations to be.
💸Buying lots of presents that this year you don’t have the budget for?
👍🏻Having to be nice to that relative who ALWAYS wants to debate (which really means argue) with you about politics, feminism, the reality of existence, how you choose to live your life etc
🍽Eating food types or amounts you don’t normally eat to placate the cook because of all the effort they have gone to, to prepare the meal.
Take some time to list them out then decide – do you have to buy presents for every one?
Do you have to engage in conversations that stress and upset you?
Is speaking up for your preferences something you can do to honour your values?
Boundaries put in place BEFORE the big day to reframe YOUR presences and expectations takes the stress or pressure off before the big day.
When you speak up in the lead up, everyone knows what to expect on the big day.
Advise before and what your budget is this year/if you have decided to not purchase at all for certain people – Kris Kringle is that an opportunity instead.
And if people STILL bring you a gift and you have nothing with which to reciprocate, be ok with that. Gift giving is a LOVE LANGUAGE for many people so make sure you so them lots of love and appreciation.
😀 Being nice
Lay the ground rules. Let people know in fun ways in the lead up, what you are happy to discuss or to not discuss when the family comes together.
If someone still brings it up on the day, remind them of your preference and walk away.
Talk to the cook before the big day. Let them know how much you value their preparation time but also let them know in advance how you want to manage your consumption on the day.
Get them on your side so if you choose to not eat the meat, or to save your food on a smaller size plate to mange your portion control, they can BACK YOU!
They will know it isn’t personal.
They will have the reason and information so you do not need to validate yourself on the day.
How they choose to respond in the conversation before hand and on the day, ultimately is up to them.
How you respond, is then up to you.
Look after yourself on the big day.
Decide what YOUR best outcome is, express it and stick to it.
This time of year is about love and self love and stress management on the day can be manage through the lead up.
I also know that everyone circumstances are different so let me know if you need help with managing anything else.